Getting Hammered

My first outing since the Chemo. I go out to Piper's house, Ana Paula's sister-in-law's. The cousins are all running around, the steaks start a fire on the grill, wine glasses spill... I am officially o.u.t.

I'm working on taking who I am now, how I feel now and work this person into my life. I feel like a walking science experiment. I am slower - we walk to Piper's and I do my 'old man from Florida' shuffle. I go slow only because going fast tires me out. I laugh at the offers of wine, because alcohol is the furthest thought from my mind.... just like in college when I got alcohol poisoning from all those 7 & 7's and the thought of alcohol made me want to wretch... same thing here. I can feel the toxins in my blood and my body wants 'no more'.

I eat a full on meal of steak, salad and sweet corn. I find it curious that I have NO sweet tooth. I try a chocolate brownie just to see. 'blah'. It doesn't even taste good (now I know there is something wrong with me). My tongue feels swollen. It tingles slightly. Must be more toxins coming out.

We laugh, we joke, we gossip.... I so love being around large extended families. It feeds me. And that feels good.

I pull the cancer card only once tonight... I made them all come to me for the photo :)

I'm wanting to go home tonight, sleep in my own bed, but the truth is I'm now exhausted. The thought of packing my car tires me. I am flat out. AP takes one look at me and gently suggests I take it slow and spend another night sleeping here.

I am so grateful for all the love and support that is effortlessly extended to me.