meeting an angel, literally

I had just left my one week after chemo appointment with Dr. G. , where everything is going well. My White Blood Cells (WBC) are fine for a Wednesday after chemo. Nurse Ana got all freaked out that I’m eating raw foods (she doesn’t want to hear the sushi stories), Dr. G is fine with my raw food consumption, as studies don’t show if is our food’s bacteria or our own bodies bacteria cause neutrapinic fever – I’m still taking my anti-biotics, so I have no idea how I could get sick. The dry skin is cumulative from the chemo and normal. I still have eyebrows, impressive. The neropathy comes and goes, normal. The shortness of breath coming and going is normal. The thick yellow coat on my tongue has become normal. I’m negotiating new drugs from the acid and reflux after the chemo, which is probably a side-effect of the steroid meds. Dr. G. is pleased I am napping. They all gave me compassionate nods as I played my ‘lack of nose hairs’ violin’. I’m going back on Friday to have another blood draw to confirm my WBC are high enough to go off the anti-biotics.

Everybody is smiling. I leave in a good mood. I have some time to spare before Ana Paula and I give a talk about Doulas at a friend's yoga studio.

I come out of Cedars with my sunglasses on and make a right on Beverly. As I meander down Beverly Blvd I do a very “un-LA” move: when I approached La Cienega Blvd, across from the Beverly Center, I unexpectedly slowed down as I approached the yellow light and watch it turn to red as I come to a complete stop. This is a very long light, so I decide to take advantage of it and call Stacey in Portland. As the phone is ringing I looked up to see a man all dressed in black, with his hair slicked back with an over suntanned face, holding a wrapped and bagged subway grinder in his left hand. He looks to be homeless as he approached the cars in order from the curb, but more ‘clean’ homeless than ‘dirty’ homeless.

As he approached my car he stops right in front and proceeds to make the sign of the cross with his right hand and then bows slightly while saying, “bless you” over and over and over again. I'm a bit confused, but enthralled.

I'm not one who gives homeless people energy in the form of money, but rather I give my energy in the form of presence. I always make it a habit to look the person in the eyes when I kindly say "No" and offer them my presence, a greeting or a blessing.

A homeless person blessing me, this is a first.

I was a bit taken off-gaurd, as there are never homeless people in this part LA. Hollywood, Sunset, yeah sure. But the corner of the Beverly Center? Never before in my 11 years here. I have to confess, I was trying to determine if he was doing this to everyone in a crazy 'hearing voices' kinda way, or was he just doing this for me. And I realized he was purposely getting my attention.

He starts to talk some more in words I can not understand and makes the hand sign for money and shakes his head "no".

I forget that I am leaving Stacy a message and through my sunglasses and my tinted front window, I’m nodding back with my hands at my heart saying “thank you”.

While he is still rambling, he makes his way over to the drivers side. I want to hear what he is saying to me and I want him to see me thank him, so I roll down my darkened front window. As he approaches he is continuing to make the sign of the cross and blessing me and now I can hear his words, “No money. No Money. I see you. You see the truth. It is in your eyes. I see you. ”

At this point he is next to my window rambling blessings and thank yous on and on. To respect him, I take off my sunglasses so I can see him and look into his eyes while I say, “Thank you for your blessing.” And he looks right at me and says again, “No money. Thank you. You have given me so much already. More that I could want for this day. I am filled. Your eyes. They see the truth. Thank you. Thank you. Bless you."

And as he backs off while bowing to the corner of Beverly and La Cienega, I try to re-assess what just happened.

The light turns green and I do one quick turn to look at him before I go and he is still there, on the sidewalk he continues to making the sign of the cross and point at me while saying, "Bless you. Thank you, You have given me so much."

As the light turned green I feel warm, cleansing tears caress my face. Drop by drop they slowly rolled down.

I tell Ana Paula what just happened and she replies, "I have chills. You have just met one of God's many angels. Wow!"

I am in awe.